Need Christmas gifts for the finance nerd in your life? We’ve got you covered

Stay informed with free updates

Simply sign up to the Style myFT Digest — delivered directly to your inbox.

Christmas is coming. And, as a society, we typically wear clothes. You have to do it, or people will laugh at you. Or shun you. Or be drawn to you, probably in a way you wish they wouldn’t be.

So why not take this as an opportunity to buy clothes for the ones you love (or are obliged to send gifts to), saving them the burden of dressing themselves? And why not make those clothes truly excellent?

SEO-conducive word padding completed, let’s reveal some of the new, seasonal additions to the FT Alphaville swag store.

Ladies, gentlemen, web scrapers, confused people reading this on a platform that takes the text but none of the images and links from the FT website, and those who fit into none of the previous categories, we got:

SPREADSHEET STUFF

UNINTUITIVE WORDPLAY

BONEY BOYS (black-on-white version here)

DESIGNS WHICH SURELY HAVE NO MARKET

THIS PRODUCT

…plus a load of other esoteric stuff over at the shop, all of which is available on a variety of hoodies, T-shirts, hats, shower curtains, stickers and more.

Go! Spend! Clothe them! Be adored!

Further reading:
— Yet another link to the shop